It is undeniable that pain and suffering surround us. We see it in the daily headlines and the evening news. Suffering is real, but is also very personal. Philosophical discussion such as what follows can be beneficial, but only in its proper time and place. First and foremost be there. Love them. Share in their suffering. Hold their hand and listen. Love is a salve that can comfort and heal better than most medicines.
Four Sisters
Being a catechist has brought much joy over the years. We have been blessed to have had a small part in the formation of hundreds of young souls, each child a beautiful reflection of God’s love. Some students are fairly easy to engage, others require more creative attempts, and with a few we wonder if our efforts found only rocky ground. The children come from diverse social, economic, and domestic backgrounds, each facing unique challenges. Among our students four young sisters stand out starkly. We have come to love them especially. They are each kind, soft-spoken and sweet, one painfully shy, one confident and eager to participate, one quiet and contemplative, one happy and playful. About five years ago, their mother tragically died shortly after being diagnosed with cancer.
What do you say? What do you do? Most of us have suffered personally or have at least been in the helpless position of standing by suffering loved ones. At times we can perceive to some extent a reason for the pain, but what of the childhood illness? What of the debilitating disease that limits your ability to perform the most basic human functions? What of the children who lost their mother?
What If There Was No Pain?
The world we live in often seems very far from the one promised us by faith. Our experiences of evil and suffering, injustice and death, seem to contradict the Good News; they can shake our faith and become a temptation against it. –Catechism of the Catholic Church (CCC) #164
Pain and suffering CAN lead to doubt. If God really loves me wouldn’t he take away my pain? Perhaps. And yet feeling pain is a gift. It is a way that God tells us, “Don’t do that.” Imagine the damage you could do to your body if you did not feel pain. Only when you began to smell the burning flesh would you remove your hand from the hot stove. BBC News shared a story called The Agony of Feeling No Pain in which Steven Pete shared his experience with Congenital Analgesia, the inability to feel pain. Steven said, “As for doctors, I think they understand the condition. They just don’t understand the human component of it – the psychology of what can happen when you grow up not being able to experience pain.”
Divine Discipline
As I shared in a previous post about giving thanks even for pain, I underwent painful surgery and rehab about 20 years ago. I can now rejoice in that pain as it brought about a greater healing. Suffering can be a form of Divine Discipline, a way of purifying his disciples to burn off the dross. “For whom the Lord loves, he reproves, and he chastises the child he favors” (Proverbs 3:12). If not for the rain our tendency would be to take the sunny days for granted. Suffering gets our attention in a way contentment does not.
Redemptive Suffering
Faith in God the Father Almighty can be put to the test by the experience of evil and suffering. God can sometimes seem to be absent and incapable of stopping evil. But in the most mysterious way God the Father has revealed his almighty power in the voluntary humiliation and Resurrection of his Son, by which he conquered evil. CCC #272
It is important to understand that God has entered into our suffering in a tangible way. In his humanity Jesus dreaded his upcoming passion, and pleaded with God the Father that there might be another way (Luke 22:42). Yet in the midst of suffering he focuses not on his pain but on his persecutors saying, “Father forgive them, for they know not what they do” (23:34). God knows our pain. He shares in it.
Through our suffering we can participate in Christ’s suffering as well. The Apostle Paul writes from prison:
“I rejoice in my suffering for your sake, and in my flesh I am filling up what is lacking in the afflictions of Christ on behalf of His body, the Church.” (Colossians 1:24)
What could possibly be lacking in Jesus’ afflictions? Nothing, of course, but for our benefit a possible answer is our suffering. The catechism describes us it this way:
“Union with the passion of Christ. By the grace of this sacrament [Anointing of the Sick] the sick person receives the strength and the gift of uniting himself more closely to Christ’s Passion: in a certain way he is consecrated to bear fruit by configuration to the Savior’s redemptive Passion. Suffering, a consequence of original sin, acquires a new meaning; it becomes a participation in the saving work of Jesus.” CCC #1521
In a blog post entitled The Salvific Aspect of Suffering, Fr. Wade Menezes lists Six Benefits of Suffering:
- Suffering unites the sufferer with Jesus Christ and His Cross.
- Suffering helps us to be more sympathetic toward others who are suffering.
- Embracing suffering helps us to expiate and make reparation for past sins; that is, the temporal punishment due for them, which must be expiated either on earth or in Purgatory.
- Suffering can be offered-up for one’s personal needs and intentions, and/or for the personal needs and intentions of others.
- Suffering strengthens personal character, thus leading to growth in such virtues as patience, fidelity and peace.
- Suffering benefits the caregiver(s), in that he/or she/or they can benefit from and strengthen their views on compassion, patience and fidelity.
Ultimately we can never fully understand pain and suffering, but we can learn to more patiently bear it, and even perhaps embrace it.
“I consider that the sufferings of this present time are as nothing compared with the glory to be revealed for us. For creation awaits with eager expectation the revelation of the children of God; for creation was made subject to futility… in hope that creation itself would be set free from slavery to corruption and share in the glorious freedom of the children of God.” -Romans 18:18-21
Earthly pain, like earthly pleasure, is temporary. Hope is eternal. Hope does not disappoint. That’s a promise.
“We even boast of our afflictions, knowing that affliction produces endurance, and endurance, proven character, and proven character, hope. And hope does not disappoint.” -Romans 5:3-5
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